One of  youngest player on the 'Bulldogs', Frances 'Frank' Lionello exemplifies all that is wrong with today's youth. He was born in Elmwood Park, IL, a real shit-hole suburb outside of Chicago. As a child, Frank was not interested in sports, girls or school. In fifth grade he dropped out of school to pursue his passion; marijuana gardening.

As a teenager Frank's hobbies were (in no particular order) picking his nose, watching TV and playing NHL '87 on his Nintendo game system. When he wasn't busy with those things, he was occupied munching on Little Caesar's Pizza, junk food and smoking weed with his loser buddies, in the basement of his parent's house. Life was a breeze for this slacker. He had no responsibilities, no education and no regrets.

On his 16^th birthday, Papa Lionello gave him the old family car, a 1977 Lincoln Town Car. The car was a real shitbox. It needed a new transmission, carburetor, radio and windshield. None of that deterred Frank from taking the car out with 'Natural Addiction', his band of stoner buddies. One summer night, after getting totally obliterated on a combination of weed, barbiturates and beer, Frank and his buds decided to take a drive across the country. With Pink Floyd blaring from the boom box, the band of idiots had no idea where they were going or where they would end up. The car finally broke down in Baja, Mexico, where they all decided to reside, since grass was available on every street corner. Frank was in pothead paradise.

Shortly thereafter, 'Natural Addiction' began experimenting with stronger and more exotic forms of marijuana. One by one, the potheads began dropping dead. Perhaps they were constantly high or just plain stupid, but it never occurred to the surviving members that maybe they should give up the experimental cannabis before it also ended their life. When Frank realized he was the sole survivor, he hid the stash and called the police.

When the cops arrived, they arrested him on suspicion of murder and threw him into the infamous 'El Pollo Loco' prison. The jail was populated by the lowest, filthiest rapists and murderers in all of Mexico. Frank and his fresh gringo ass had about a zero percent chance of survival. On his third day in prison, he was cornered by three low-lives looking for some tail in the yard. Luckily, Barry 'The Butcher' Melrose rescued Lionello and made him his bitch. Melrose a former NHL player and coach was doing some time himself for attempting to smuggle some merchandise (illegal immigrant housekeepers) across the border. He was coaching the Baja 'Bandejos' of the Mexican Summer League at the time of his arrest. 

Under the 'Butcher's'  tutelage, Frank grew a mullet and learned about the finer points of hockey. It was the first time in his life that he had ever participated in an activity that required physical or mental activity. Frank and his sore rectum were released two months later, after an autopsy revealed that 'Natural Addiction' had died of natural causes. Melrose was released shortly thereafter.

Upon his release, Melrose invited Frank to tryout with the 'Bandejos'. Frank bought a 1981 Lincoln Town Car after he made the team as a right winger/center.  He would go on to play with Baja for two more years before returning to the US. While in the US, Frank signed a contract with the Palatine 'Camel Punchers' of the HTHL. He used his signing bonus to buy a 1984 Lincoln Town Car. After the team disbanded, he signed with the Ayers 'Warriors'.

The 'Warriors' were one of the most dreadful teams in HTHL history. It was usually the club where mostly undesirables, has-beens and never-will-bees ended up. It was bad enough that they rarely ever won, but Frank had to deal with some of the most selfish and bizarre personalities he had ever encountered. Featuring players like Shawn 'All Me' Ayers, Joe 'Monkey F*ck' Holloway, Dennis 'Quick Draw' Cole and Hendo 'the Horrible' Henderson, Frank was contemplating quitting.

In early 2003, the Karim brothers found themselves with no choice but to sign with the 'Warriors' after they were let go by 'Capitol Punishment'. Once they arrived, Frank's game and the 'Warriors' dramatically improved. Most teams would embrace their new-found success but the 'Warriors' transformed into a team of prima donnas with dissension and power struggles becoming the main focus. Frank and the Karim's left after the end of the season to play with the 'Bulldogs' of the DHL.

With the exception of a two month stint in the Mexican League, Frank has played for the 'Bulldogs' since 2003. He currently plays right wing, still smokes grass and drives a 1990 Lincoln Town Car.