GAME RECAP BULLDOGS Drunken Penguins Date/Time Rink 17 0 07/18/2005 East Rink

July 19th, 2005- Less than a week after setting several franchise records, the Bulldogs showed no signs of slowing down, sorely defeating the Penguins by scoring a record- shattering 17 goals and allowing the Penguins only 8 total shots and no goals.

The Bulldogs were shorthanded coming into the game with Ted Marcos and Joey V. being last minutes scratches. Joey V., one of the team’s top scorers, sustained a serious injury attempting to control the homeless population by showing off his newly-acquired samurai skills. Although Joey V. required over a dozen stitches, doctors at Cook County Hospital have announced that the homeless man is not expected to survive his injuries. Said Joey V. upon hearing the news: “If he dies, he dies.” Mr. V further insists that he thought the homeless man was a sack of rabid rats intent on killing him.

As a result of the injuries, team captain Jason Darfler adjusted the lines and set a tone in the locker room. “We hate these guys and these guys hate us. Let’s go out there and kick their asses.” The first place Bulldogs did not disappoint. After Sam Karim’s early goal (the first of 3), the Bulldogs never looked back, scoring 6 goals on 21 shots in the first period alone.

The second period saw the Bulldogs further exhibit their domination. The ‘Dogs’ hustled on every play on both sides of the ice. While holding their opponents to only 3 shots on goal, the Bulldogs took 16 shots and added 5 more goals to their total, tying their old single-game goals record with yet an entire period left to play.

At the 13:42 mark of the third period, Jason Darfler broke the franchise record at 12 goals and became the second of three players that evening to get a hat trick. Ryne Gertsner and Sam Karim also achieved this feat. The overmatched Penguins would watch helplessly as the Bulldogs closed the game by adding 6 more goals in the 3^rd period, with every single player on the Bulldogs’ Monday night roster scoring either a goal or an assist.

The defeat unambiguously dispelled several claims by Penguin players that the Bulldogs possessed some magical rabbit’s foot that helped them defeat the aptly named ‘Drunken Penguins’ in each of two earlier meetings.  The Bulldogs showed their disdain for such comments by completely annihilating and effectively embarrassing the Penguins.

• Joey V.’s indictment on murder charges. Note to Joey F. V.: They may be dirty and they may stink, but the homeless are people too.

• Penguins’ goalie: Not only did he play poorly, but by refusing to shake hands at the end of the game he proved to be in dire need of sportsmanship skills.

• Penguin players’ sour grapes attitude: At the completion of the game, several Penguin players were heard making comments that the Bulldogs’ victory was the result of their opponents “not really trying.”

   

Next up: Next for the Bulldogs is an Exhibition Game again the Molly Malone’s on 07/20/05 at 10:15pm.